I met Dela on the 5th of August 2022. It was just an ordinary night until he spoke to me. Our connection was instant. Although we started off as friends, I knew in my heart that our story would end in romance. When we talked, it felt like we knew each other from a past life. We would chat, laugh, and tease each other. You know what they say, “If you can make a girl laugh then you can steal her heart.” Everything was just so effortless with him.
He asked me to be his girlfriend less than two weeks after we met. And I said yes immediately. That’s how deeply we felt about each other. We were happy. We made plans for the future. We talked about marriage, kids, and the kind of parents we were going to be. It all looked good on paper. Of course, there were bumps in the road. We had our sunny days as well as our stormy days. But we always worked out our problems and came out stronger.
Dela was a kind-hearted, selfless, and generous man who would go miles just to make me happy. I was unemployed when we started dating so he encouraged me to go back to school. “Studying for a profession will give you a competitive edge in the job market. And the sooner you start achieving your dreams, the better it will be for our future,” he said. I completely agreed with him so I went back to school.
I never questioned my place in his life until his ex called him one day and he lied about it. It troubled me that he did that. I started to wonder what else he was lying about. So I went into his phone and noticed that he was receiving calls and messages from other ladies. I got scared and felt I was going to lose him to one of these women. So I did something I never thought I would do. I took the numbers of the women on his phone.
I knew it was not right but I called these women and asked them about their relationship with Dela. I was just trying to protect my relationship. He was angry when he found out but we addressed my insecurities and made up. Our relationship continued as smoothly as possible.
On the 3rd of April this year, Dela woke up right next to me yet decided not to talk to me. He had never done anything like that. Not even on days we had big fights. So I was surprised. It was hurtful to keep speaking to someone who was ignoring me so I kept quiet and watched him. He went out without saying anything to me. When he returned he brought me food. The only thing he said was, “This is your food.” Before I could talk to him he took off again.
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Our prepaid electricity finished while he was still out. Seeing as he wasn’t talking to me I couldn’t call him. Instead, I sent him mobile money and followed up with a text that he should use the money to buy airtime. He didn’t acknowledge receipt of the money or the message. When he got back there was still no electricity. I asked him if he received the money but he ignored me.
I waited for a while and asked him the same question again, and this time he gave me a rude response. I couldn’t take it anymore so told him, “Since morning you have been moody. I don’t know what I did to offend you but it seems I am the cause of your mood swings. If you won’t talk to me I’m leaving.” That was when he finally spoke, “You can leave.” So I left.
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I had no idea that that was the end of our relationship. Dela sent me a long breakup message listing everything I did in the past that he claimed he forgave me for. My heart broke that very instant. I asked his friend to plead my case but he refused to reconsider his decision. He told his friend I accused of cheating, called him a thief, and a liar. These were all misunderstandings we cleared up. So I don’t know why he is still holding on to them. I have called several times to apologize. I also sent him many messages, all of which he ignored.
It doesn’t matter to me if he was wrong or if it was all my fault. All I want is him. His absence in my life is too painful for me to endure. I want him back. I need him like the way my body needs oxygen. Please help me tell him that I miss him. I miss us so much. If my pillow could speak, it would tell tales of all the tears I have cried over him. Dela, please come back to me.
—Hertho
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My sis,are you begging a man who deosnt love you to come back to you,he wanted to leave you but was looking for an opportunity,leave him and concentrate on your life, better days ahead dear!
He does not want you but was finding it difficult to let you know. You have not offended him in anyway he has falling for another person and you have become his ex. Just move on.
He is bringing up issues that the two of you have trashed out already, it simply means that he doesn’t have any reason to break up with you. Leave him alone.
It’s tough but I have to restate the obvious. You can lead a horse to water but you can’t force it to drink. As painful as it is you must shake the dust off your feet and move on. It’s his loss. Love as pure and genuine as yours is rare and hard to find. In time you will heal and find someone worthy of your love. Most importantly don’t allow this experience to define your relationships going forward!