I entered the auditorium and sat next to her. We talked a little, and I asked if I could have her contact. We exchanged contacts, and that was it for the night. Usually, as a man, when I get a lady’s contact, I’m always eager to talk to her. There’s always something you want to know, and if she’s the kind you want to lure into dating you, you don’t want to waste time at all. You get home and call her.

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Usually, she would ask, “Who am I talking to?” And you’d say, “Oh, I’m the guy you met at the program. Do you remember? The guy with the beard.”

That’s always the most awkward phase of the whole thing. But once you cross that line, when she makes things easy for you, you find your flow and take it one day at a time to see where it leads.

But this was different. I wasn’t eager to call her or go through the phase I just described. I had her number saved on my phone but wasn’t thinking about it. Maybe I was going to call her someday and take her through the arduous memory lane of trying to remind her where we met, but that didn’t happen. Instead, she called me and asked, “Were you the guy I met at the program? The one who took my number?”

I responded, “Yes, that’s me.”
She asked, “So when are you going to call me?”

I didn’t even know how to answer that. I made up some excuses and gave them to her. Maybe she knew I was lying, but she bought it anyway. I told her, “I’m on my way out of town. I have a meeting I need to attend.” She screamed on the phone, “Oh no, don’t leave like that! You have to see me before you go.”

I shelved every plan I had and went to see her. The moment I set my eyes on her, I felt it. Maybe the voice in my head whispered, “She’s the one,” but I didn’t hear it because I was so consumed by what I was seeing. The first time I met her was at night, so the darkness hid part of who she was. When I saw her again, this time in daylight, I saw everything and connected with her in a special way.

We never stopped talking until one day, we talked our way into marriage. We’ve been at it for the past five years now, and here’s what I’ve learned:

#1. Communication. There’s nothing more to say about that. Whatever good things people say about communication in marriage is true. Take it to heart.

#2. Take care of the home, no matter what. Even if the world outside is pulling you by the collar, use the little time you have to take care of the home before you give in to external pressures.

#3. Love your wife. It sounds basic and cliché, but it’s a cliché for a reason. I’m a very stubborn person, but I learned a lesson last year.

I Left Him Because He Didn’t Help In The Kitchen

We were fighting to the point of not talking to each other. Tempers were high, and pride and ego took their seats in the corners of our home, urging us to act prideful and egotistical. Then I fell seriously ill. Right then and there, I saw ego and pride leave through the window, leaving us to handle our issues without them. My wife sat next to me and patiently nursed me back to health.

I told myself, “Never again will I play with the emotions of this one.” So, I’ve learned to love not because it’s a requirement but because I know love calms the storm and makes things easier.

—Felix

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